Proprioception: Knowing where you are

"Proprioception is a distinct sensory modality that provides feedback solely on the status of the body internally. It is the sense that indicates whether the body is moving with required effort, as well as where the various parts of the body are located in relation to each other. " - Wikipedia

I bumped into this term while reading "The man who mistook his wife for a hat" and it some how caught up with me and is still stuck in my head. "Muscle Memory" as people commonly refer to it, is basically the sense that tells the mind the exact position of various body parts and what's their movement status. While we all hear of this term "muscle memory" numerous times and in all sorts of situations, we don't think too highly of it. Easily taken for granted like most other functionality that are powered by our brain, it's extremely helpful in being where we are and even a small damage to it can leave us in a sordid state. It could be painful situation when your brain doesn't know where a body part exactly is, to understand what I mean imagine that you have to look down at your feet while moving to see where/how they are or if you don't see any body part and try to control it, it just might be hanging vaguely or twisted in a painful position or something scarier.

I've been a student of Jazz dance for quite some time now(in my second stint), the total duration has been about a year or so now. One of the things we've been told from day one is to walk/dance(maybe sit, stand and even sleep) with your stomach pulled in (not relaxed and all over the place). Superficially speaking it's just about pulling your stomach but there's more to proprioception then just that. The point is that if you keep your body parts in a position for long enough, the brain will learn their new positions/locations and after some practice they will be the new default position for those parts. It's surprising how unaware we are about our body posture/parts and their default states. Unless someone points to us specifically we don't realize if our stomach is relaxed, or our shoulders are loose or hips are hanging(forgive the dx lingo) or worse the back(bone) isn't straight.

Discovering your body is a beautiful experience. It's a journey only a few lucky people get to take and being aware of where you are in space and what's good/bad about it, how can you align them to stay fit,look good etc is a truely great feeling. It's one of my many learnings at Danceworx, being aware of how exactly is your body aligned/placed as you do certain things. Stopping in middle of things to check what's the location/position of various body parts and how they should be instead. While other things will come and go, this vision of seeing your body as it is, is one of the wonderful things that I've experienced and learned, and I wish to carry this with me forever.

Do you observe your body enough to understand it ?

The Expectation Trap

For as long as I can remember I have this strange problem of expecting people(especially close friends) to do things in a way I would have done had I been in their place. Needless to say I've been disappointed more times than I remember or can count. On the face of it, it's not that big a deal to expect people to act in the way I would have acted had I been in their position, for ex: I need some help from close friend in a particular situation, then I would expect that close friend to help me to the extent in which I would have helped in had he been in my position but trust me, it's really a great deal(full of disappointments).

I get particularly fed up when people(read friends) fall way short of expectations and behave in the most weirdest of ways. Add to this the fact that through most of my life I've given equal(almost) importance to my friends and family but many a times I have felt let down upon. Maybe it happens with everyone but I certainly have had my share of such experiences. Be it closest of your friends or people who met you somewhere on the crossroads of life and happened to get along enough to hang out for few months or years. The sad bit being I am not yet able to identify any pattern in this and thus have run into such situations again and again. I hope I am not this way to anyone I know.

Last two months have been really hard for me, harder than anything I've ever been through and I expected people around me, especially those that matter to have behaved in a certain way but I have no qualms in accepting that I've been hugely disappointed. Barring a couple odd people, most people have let me(and my expectations) down to the extent that now I regret spending the time I spent with them. I am cool about all other things but the time I spent(read wasted) on them, hanging out with them, listening 'em out and if needed offering a helping hand in their hour of need(or breakup as in many cases).

I know I might sound over critical and rude but more often than not people suck at communicating. They just can't communicate. I still don't understand how can people be like that. Some of my supposedly good friends either didn't call me to ask how are things or did it just once/twice in the span of 60 days and only I know what did I got to hear from those who did.
It was a surprising(which might be and I hope too it's wrong) realization that people are way too out of world to handle crisis like situations because of limitations in which they see things and how they approach them(within a restricted realm of possibilities).

On sharing the above mentioned with a dear friend I was told that it all depends on the type of individual, some people who are helpful and likes will be supportive, caring etc with all their friends alike(irrespective of who spends more time with time) while those who aren't, will be the same i.e at a superficial level. It sounds like a logical thing to me and I guess that's the case but if that's the case 1) why didn't I realize those people are like that and 2) I don't think I need more people of that kind in my life.

Moral of the story: If you can't lower your expectations, lower the number of people who fall in the area of expectation to lessen disappointments.