The Love Problem of A Student - Part One

By a stroke of fate I ended up spotting, buying & reading Carl Jung's
"Aspects of the Feminine". Ever since I began reading it I've been completely lost in the ideas/thoughts presented in it and feel like spending more time wandering in those deep thoughts of human psyche. What follows below is an attempt for the same by quoting some of the ideas from a chapter titled "The Love Problem of A Student" which can serve as bookmark for the thoughts presented.

Love is a force of destiny whose power reaches from heaven to hell.
The bone of contention here is Love problem involving a student, what causes it and what becomes of it because unlike love between two adults marriage is not the socially/morally apt solution.

The discussion starts from the fact that why child marriages(marriage between two students) isn't particularly good. The most obvious reasons being lack of social, financial & psychological maturity and some practical problems concerning parents education and livelihood and child's upbringing. Since having children by a child marriage is not the best thing the discussion wanders to the importance of having children in a marriage and how they act like a cement between parents and prevent them to think on a purely individualistic/selfish terms.

Another interesting aspect of the whole discussion is the effect puberty and sexual maturity has on boys and girls. While in girls the sexual maturity comes gradually with time in boys there's an outburst of sexuality around onset of puberty but on the contrary the psychological maturity comes earlier to girls as compared to the boys of same age. "He now has the sexuality of a grown man with the soul of a child" quotes Jung.On the other hand most women get in touch with their sexuality much later and at times by accident.

"Often the flood of obscene fantasies and smutty talk with schoolfellows pour like a torrent of dirty water over all his delicate and childish feelings, sometimes smothering them forever. Unexpected moral conflicts arise, temptations of every description lie in wait for him and weave themselves into fantasies. The psychic assimilation of the sexual complex causes him the greatest difficulties though he may not be conscious of its existence. The onset of puberty also brings about considerable changes in his metabolism as can be seen from the pimples and acne that so often afflict adolescents. The psyche is disturbed in a similar manner and thrown off its balance. At this age the young man is full of illusions, which are always a sign of psychic disequilibrium. They make stability and maturity of judgment impossible.His tastes, his interests, his plans alter fitfully.He can suddenly fall head over heels in love with a girl, and a fortnight later he cannot conceive how anything of that sort could have happened to him. He is so riddled with illusions that he actually needs those mistakes to make him conscious of his own taste and individual judgment. He is still experimenting with life, and must experiment with it in order to learn how to judge things correctly. Hence there are very few men who have not had sexual experiences of some kind before they are married. During puberty it is mostly homosexual experiences, and these are much more common than is generally admitted."

Moving ahead the author says heterosexual experiences come later and are not always beautiful. Because of the sexual complex, sexuality is reduced to animal play with no psychological distinctions thus just about any women will do. Author further warns us not to draw conclusions about a man's character based on this, however many experiences of this kind bring negative influences to the personality of the concerned.
"The result is that though the man in question is outwardly a respectable citizen, inwardly he is prey to sexual fantasies of the lowest kind, or else he represses them and on some festive occasion they come leaping to the surface in their primitive form, much to the astonishment of the unsuspecting wife--assuming, of course, that she notices what is going on. A frequent accompaniment is premature coldness towards the wife."

These are some of the thoughts put forward by the author and I could relate A LOT to them. Could you ?

Next part would cover college-love affairs, how they effect personalities of those involved and the case with a student being involved with an older person.